In case none of you know, (In which, you are thus ALL allowed to refer to yourselves as a bunch of "OUTDATED heaton-nites") allow me to introduce to you the greatest phenomenon that has ever rocked the face of the earth... or maybe just that of Heaton in particular. Meet "KUKU", the self proclaimed (actually, by ME) official mascot of Heaton, distant cousin of Lulu (my actual housemate) and the official the face of boooze, loud parties, sayur (please do not ask me what this is, less you want to be smoothered by a ten-ton dildo) and... pure madness. (MADNESS??? THIS IS SPARTA!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAA... *refer to "KUKU's" reaction.)
KUKU, (Actual name: Kingsley's Most Awesome Pet Pigeon Ever) is actually a domesticated animal existing only within the boundary of Heaton Park's santuary. Given its seemingly hostile nature and spartan valour, it's favourtite call sign is called the 'Yo Pigeon, gimme 4!' (As indicated by the pigeon's four toes/fingers/whateverthatfreakingthingiscalleddammit) and quite surprisingly, its easily tamed by introducing to it quantities of "MINUMAN HEBAT!" of "sayur" (again, please dont ask me what this is) in which you are guaranteed to expect a full year's supply of LOVE from domesticated squirrels, mongrels, foreign pigeons, athropods, winged beast. (noticed i mentioned BEAST instead of normal "aves" or "birds")
Yet, realize that while you may be genuinely anticipating all these events with elevated heartbeats, irregular breathing patterns, and adrenalin pumping through your system, i do admit that whilst writing this load of bovine crap, i am after all under the influence of alcohol and thus my credibility rating has fallen another 145.34%, meaning that "KUKU" might be just a fragment of your imagination after all. (MGHT!) But thank you anyway for reading what an awesome pet "KUKU" actually is, and in the future i do hope to introduce him to you persoanlly. Hmmm... on second thought that might not work as well as i thought...
Anyways... toodles~
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